Hunter or Hunted?
by T R Yoji
Summary: Yumichika returns to the Soul Society after a prolonged but ultimately failed search for a renegade soul reaper. After drowning his sorrows with a few friends from the various squads he sets off home, more or less… YumiXRen


**Hunter or Hunted?**

**Plot: **Yumichika returns to the Soul Society after a prolonged but ultimately failed search for a renegade soul reaper. After drowning his sorrows with a few friends from the various squads he sets off home, more or less… YumiXRen~

**Disclaimer: **I do not own bleach, Mr. Kubo does.

"You aiming for a new record tonight or something?" Ikkaku watched on in shock and awe as a drunken Yumichika downed what looked like his twenty third shot of sake. His masses of shot glasses littering the table like tombstones in a cemetery.

"Something…" muttered the gloomy shinigami as he stared blankly into yet another empty glass. _Something…_

"C'mon, it was just an ission." slurred an even drunker Matsumoto as she leaned over for another shot, her ample cleavage somehow avoiding her amassed collection of 'tombstones'. "Not like ue never failed one befure!"

"Shut up!" Retorted the bald one "He's taking this hard; you know who the target was."

"You're mean! Baldy!" Chanted the drunkard repeatedly before collapsing into herself. Bringing snickers from several of the regulars whom littered the bar.

"She's right, though. You need to lighten up. It's just Renji." Rukia added as she continued to sip on her first shot of the night. "Somebody should wake her up before she suffocates…"

"I say we let leave her be." Ikkaku snapped back. _I shave, damn it_!

"Have it your way." Rukia added. "But still, not talking about it isn't going to make things better."

_What's the point in all this? Talking about that ugly jerk won't bring him back…_"I-"

"I think it's a dumb idea." Ikkaku interrupted bluntly "We're men of 11th company! Since when did we talk about such things?" He gloated loudly as he swung an arm around his friend. Much to Rukia's surprise, it seemed to comfort the gloomy narcissist.

"Right… Men of 11th company… _Thanks._"

_What the hell is with men and their emotions?_ "You guys are all alike." Rukia pouted, defeated in her attempt to bring emotional recognition to mankind.

"I think ill be going now." The usually optimistic narcissist commented as he staggered to his feet. _I've had an ugly month…_ "Goodnight." He added as he slowly wobbled out the bar, his legs moving like wet straw.

"Great, you scared him away. Good work Rukia." Ikkaku congratulated his one remaining conches drinking buddy with fake applause.

"W-What did I do?!" She snapped back.

"Gah!" Matsumoto squealed as she regained both consciousness and breath. "I should tie those things down… Hey, where's Yumi-chan?!"

"The land of Oz." Ikkaku taunted the defenseless drunk.

"Oh my, that's awful!" She shouted as she jumped to her feet, only to be taken down by the sudden urge to puke.

"You should lay off the sake…" Rukia added as she continued to sip.

"You should grow bigger boobs!" Matsumoto snapped between convulsions, bringing the bald one and about eighty percent of the other patrons to tears.

"At least I don't suffer a risk of self suffocation!" The short one pouted indignantly as the others continued to laugh.

_Why did you run away?_ Yumichika asked himself over and over again as he strolled towards the outskirts of town. Each trembling step took him closer to the unpopulated wilderness of the surrounding forest. Each thought brought him closer to tears. _Why didn't you tell me why… or where...? _"Bastard…" He hung his head as his arms wrapped around himself. His legs now carried him through the dense shrubbery that surrounded the trees. _I thought I was… Special. To you... Someone you desired. Someone you… Loved. _"You bastard!" He cried out to the tree trunks that supported the canopy that was now above him. _You lied to me…_

"Psh!" whispered a voice from a nearby tree. It's pitch catching the shinigami completely by surprise.

"W-Whose there?!" Shouted the now battle ready Yumichika. Instinctively he took a step back and reached for his sword. However, his intoxicated form turned his usually graceful movements into a drunken fumble and fall. _Ow…_"You're gonna pay for that. _Whoever you are_"

"Psh!" Spoke the tree again, this time with a hint of laughter in its tone.

"You think this is funny?" Grunted the shinigami as he propped himself up with his Zanpakuto. "Ill turn you into a pile of shavings!" He roared as he charged the tree. With an overextended swing he cut through the tree, making easy work of it despite his laxness. "Die! Die! DIE!" He chanted angrily as he continued to hack at the lump of timber. "Stupid, ugly tree!"

"Psh!" Came the voice again, interrupting the shinigami and his brutal mutilation of the slain tree. "Why are you hacking away at that thing?" Another tree asked.

"Because I thought it was you." Retorted the shinigami "But since you've corrected me, I guess ill cut you down too!" He roared again as he charged and split the tree. "Die! Die! DIE!"

"Psh! I'm over here." Interrupted the voice again, pissing off the shinigami even more.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Yumichika moaned "Didn't your father give you any hugs during your childhood because you were too ugly to touch?"

"I aren't the one with feathers on my face." Retorted the voice "You look like a woodpecker flew into yo-"

"SON OF A BITCH!" Shouted the beauty as he threw his blade into the tree "If it takes all night, if it ravages my beautiful face, I will kill you by the end of the night!"

"Only if you can catch me~"

The chase continued into the night. Tree after tree after tree, the chase left a path of destruction in its wake. With each slain tree, the shinigami grew more exhausted and less drunk.

"Why won't you face me like a warrior? You're obviously not a tree."

"Why should I? Your face might make my eyes melt." The voice retorted, trying to lure the shinigami deeper into the woods.

_This is taking too long, time to end this and get some beauty sleep._ "Fujikujaku! Time to finish this." He spoke to his blade as it transformed, it curving and splitting like a fan at his command. "Since I'm gonna kill you I might as well show you the secret to my Zanpakuto. Please don't tell anybody if you're reborn."

"Your Zanpakuto's secret abili-gah!" cried out the voice before thumping to the ground.

"Ha! Got you." Yumichika rejoiced as he congratulated himself inwardly. His face seeming to rejuvenate as his blade slowly returned to normal. _Now to walk over to the bastard behind the tree and…" _His inner monolog went on as he rounded the tree to face his unconscious tormentor. "Renji?..." His jaw dropped for a moment before quickly closing up. His eyes welled with tears, only to be held back with fury. _You… you're the... _"You bastard!" He shouted as he swiped a hand across the redhead's face.

"OUCH!" Moaned the renegade at his forceful wakeup "What the hell did you do that for?" he complained as he rubbed his face.

"What did I do that for?" Yumichika spoke softly, his voice taking on the characteristics of the old phrase 'calm before the storm.' "What did I do that for?..."

_This... Isn't looking good…_"Y-Yumi-kun, I can explain." He pleaded as his hands moved from his face to a defensive position.

"Explain what?!" Yumichika raged as he kicked the renegade in the side "How you ran away without a word! Without telling anyone!" His voice got tighter as he continued "How you didn't tell me…" He paused, turning his head with sudden speed. Avoiding eye contact at all costs now, hiding the tears that failed to stay at bay. "You didn't tell me..."

"Y-yumi-?" Renji stuttered as his hands moved from his aching side to the shinigami's hand.

"Don't 'Yumi' me you bastard!" He snapped down at the redheaded renegade as he quickly retracted his hand, tears flying from his face. "How could you?" _Do you even care?_

"I-I can explain." Renji pleaded, but to no avail. The shinigami had already gone, leaving behind a trail of tears and a red feather.

_How could he? _Repeated the shinigami to himself as he ran past the various trees that littered the woodland. _I thought I meant something to him-_

"Yumichika!" cried the renegade as he approached from the rear "We need to talk!"

_Talk? _"Piss off you ugly beast! Do I look like I want to talk?" He retorted bitterly as he increased his pace.

"C'mon, talking will help." Renji pleaded as he tried to keep up despite his exhaustion.

"No need to talk, I'm fully capable of understanding your absence." He forced out in the most beautiful tone he could muster. "I'm obviously too 'ugly' for you to-"

"I was on a mission!" roared the redhead, his words echoing through the narcissist's skull with such intensity that his legs ceased to function.

"A mission?" Repeated the beauty as his pace quickly decreased to a standstill.

"Yes, a mission." Huffed the redhead as he staggered towards his now frozen target.

_A mission? What mission?... Yamamoto didn't tell me anything about another mission when he gave me mine… Was it a secret, and if so, why?_ Contemplated the beauty intensely. _This whole thing sounds… Ugly… _"You will have to explain this to me…"

"I would love to." Wheezed the shinigami as he leaned against a tree "J-just give me… Five minuets…" He requested as his back slid down the rough trunk.

It was a cold, crisp morning in the soul society. Winter had just ended and spring was about to explode upon the world in a blaze of glory. The snow had melted and the seeds of future beauty were plotting and planning their colorful takeover. However, they weren't the only ones.

"Hey, Yumi~" Soothed the groggy redhead as he propped himself up on his elbows. "Wake up, I've got something for you~" He spoke sweetly as he snickered internally, sweet, soothing deception hiding his perverse agenda.

"Ugh." groaned the sleeping beauty in an uncharacteristically beastly fashion. Reluctant to face the waking world and all it's tediously little details.

_Heh…_ Renji giggled to himself. _He's even cuter when he's like this._ He continued to admire the sleeping shinigami as the morning went on. His concentration and focus not shifting at all until an eerily reminiscent fluttering caught his attention. _Crap, A hell butterfly._ He groaned internally as he reached out for it with much distain. _I bet that bastard Byakuya just found another reason to piss me-Top Secret And Urgent?!_

"You summoned me, sir?" A fully clothed Renji asked the general as he knelt down in typical subordinate fashion.

"Yes, Renji. I have a matter that requires your urgent attention." The general spoke grimily in his deep, authority driven voice. "There has been an increasing amount of activity of Menoce attacks in the human world. I believe this has something to do with Aizen's remaining subordinates."

_Crap! This isn't sounding good…_ Renji whaled internally, dreading the inevitable.

"I will need you to go to the Menoce realm and gather information. You have a week." His voice demanded.

"Yes, sir!" Renji replied, hiding all his frustration. _A week in Menoce without Yumi, shit!_ _I better get the captain seat for this…_

"And that is that." The redhead concluded to his captive audience, his breath regained.

"B-but you were gone for a month! Why?!" Yumichika demanded indignantly, throwing his usually beautiful tone to the wind.

"Things got complicated." Renji replied with a shrug of his shoulders "That bastard Ichigo showed up and interfered. Just showed up and blew the place apart." He sighed "One of his attacks hit me by mistake and destroyed my pass. I couldn't get back from the Menoce world without hijacking a Hollow and riding him back like a horse." He concluded.

_You rode a Hollow… Like a horse?_ Yumi deliberated internally as he visualized such an action. The final result of which brought him into a fit of uncontainable laughter. "Like a horce?! HAHA!!"

"It isn't funny, you know!" Renji snapped back. "Any idea how hard those things are to capture? Very!" His complaints fell on deaf ears; his partner's laughter had to burn itself out.

It took a while, but Yumi finally regained control over himself. Slowly, he fixed his now laugh jolted hair and took in a deep breath. Resulting in a deeper, relaxation laced sigh. "I'm sorry… But how else am I expected to react to such a notion?"

"You could show some sympathy for your lover." He retorted "It's not like it was all sunshine and puppies without you."

"So…" The shinigami spoke softly as a menacing smirk appeared on his face "You missed me?"

"Hell yes." The redhead admitted bluntly as he grew slightly redder. Causing his lover to instantly lose his smirk and dawn a few shades of rouge.

_He missed me? Then-_

"Oh, Yumi." The shinigami interrupted the other's train of thought. "You dropped this." He said as he extended a feather holding hand.

"Ah." Yumi said completely caught off guard by the sudden appearance of his 'beauty enhancer.' Slowly, he reached for it and proceeded to return it to its rightful place. Al the while his companion stayed fixated on him, as if watching a play. "What?" Yumi questioned.

"You're missing something." He replied as he leaned in closer.

"What might that be-" The shinigami tried to reply, only to be cut off by the contact of his lover's warm, welcoming lips. Slowly, instinctively, his eyes closed and his body kissed back. His arms folding around his lover, pulling him in closer as the kiss raged on. "Ngh." _This is just so… Beautiful._ His mind raced as their interaction gradually drew to a close. Their lips parted, unleashing a desperate moan for more.

"I've got something else for you~" The redhead soothed his now scarlet faced lover.

"Not with your low energy, you don't~" Yumi replied with a huge grin on his face "But don't worry; I can wait a little longer."

And that's that, the end of this story. I know, I know. Usually something this long would climax with a climax. However, I'm holding off on the smut for at least another two stories. Just because I can~

If you enjoyed it, hated it, or read the whole thing then please comment. I'm always open to suggestions on how to improve my works.


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